After...

There is a calmness to be found
When blood is spilled
The strange quiet after
The burst of violence
The dull silence after
The sharp, stinging pain
The quiet in the mind
After so many voices
Continuously overlapping one another
As if the volume is suddenly turned down
After it was at maximum for hours
Peaceful yet strangely awakening
Watching your life force
Pouring out in a thin ribbon
A reminder of how fragile the body is
After much of the war centered in the mind....

Lost

Head heavier than lead
Wishing i could rest it
On your shoulder one more night
Alone with the stars
Baring our hearts into morninglight

I know not which is the dragon
Im relentlessly chasing
You...or just the feeling
Every waking hour... to no avail
Mercilessly tormented...to no end

Maybe it is both... perhaps neither
Probably I'm just longing for an escape
Unintentionally hooked to this addiction
Pain or pleasure? No matter... drunk in desire
My fix... nowhere within my reach

Lost... not willing to find a path
Afraid there might not be one
I only ever felt belonged
In your eyes... I found home
Then you turn and say its all an illusion

You shattered my reality
Stole the tears from my eyes
And the breath out my lungs
I lost my words, my voice
Terrified...I'll lose my mind next...

Fickle

My darling your are flickle
One day you begged for me hand
The next you couldn't spare a glance for a second
The third day you showered me wit love
Tuck my hair behind my ears and whisper sweet words
Raining kisses on my neck, running fingers through my hair
Now you turn your back and say you don't care
My darling you are naive
To think I will beg and cry
You come and you go, uncertain as the wind blows
You think you are good at games
Let me show you all the highs and lows
You hoped to put me on my knees
But it my turn to roll
It's a gamble baby, now the dice will show.

Too heavy a price

I was drowning
But i never should have let you save me
The life line you threw
Shaping to be a noose for me
You keep breaking my heart in two
But evertime it heals, it still beats for you
I can't make sense of anything around me
Everything seems to move but im stuck here
Unable to stop thinking of you and me
My heart aching
Piercing pain shooting through my body
I'm curled in a ball
Tasting my own tears as it falls
How can the world go on
When you don't love me
How can everything goes normally
While I lose what meant the most to me
How can I breathe
If i can never see the twinkle in your eyes
Right before you smile, the crinkle around your lips
As you give me a wink to repay my incessant teasing
Your laughter melts my insides, makes me wanna lay at your feet
Your eyes capturing mine, helding it hostage
While you brand my soul, with your very essence
Every tears that I spill
Hopelessly trying to tame the fires of agony
Desperately wanting to bury my head in your chest
Tasting your lips, savouring your tongue
Once to me was nectar, now the bitterness i can't stand
Unable to erase from my memory, this vile poison stealing my mind away from me...

Melody

You are the melody that the wind dances to in a warm sunny day
I keep searching for you but in the corners of my eyes you stay
Everytime I thought I had you figured, you show me the errors of my way
You come and you go, just stay for a while...I hope and I pray

Frantically searching for your laughter fearing its already fading away
As the cold wind blows, so you goes, your lingering warmth revealing a pathway
I try to catch up, but in this dwindling light I couldn't find the way
You are the melody of a sunny day but in the dark, silent night I'm forced to stay

You are the melody that the wind dances to on a warm sunny day
Light as a songbird you whistle my burdens away
Your tune takes me to places faraway
Soft as breeze your spell binds me to stay
Lost in your eyes yet I found my way
Brightest as Sirius in the constellation array
You shine all my darkness away

Fingerprints

Fingerprint upon my heart
From when u lightly touched them
Jolted my feelings alive
A million stars exploded under my skin
Fingerprints upon my heart
from when u carelessly ripped them apart
When you told me we could never be together
And that you don't feel the way I do
Fingerprints upon my heart
Is what I have left of u
From when u grasp my fragile heart
Forcefully wrenched it from my chest
And let it slip through your fingers
Shattering into a million tiny pieces
Fingerprints upon my heart
From when you left your mark
A painting that's supposed to be admired
Now a stain to be covered
Like a hunter tagging its prey
You haunt me through all eternity
With just your fingerprints upon every little pieces of my heart.

Piece by Pieces

I gave u my trust
Bit by bit
Everyday
I gave a piece of me
Till i gave you every pieces of me
Exposed to your eyes
I let you judge me
Trusted you not to break me
Laying down on your altar
I willingly handed you
My insecurities my vulnerability
My joy my happiness
My secrets my shames
My sadness my tears
My heart my soul
I gave every piece of me
Till im naked and bleeding
But you never looked back
Im aching and yearning
For your touch, your kisses
You continue walking away
Im longing for your presence
But I hv to learn to be in your absence 

Love or live

I understand not this overwhelming feeling that comes with no warning
Like a full moon radiating everything it has, with no sign of waning
I feel the potency of my love through my every nerve ending
Heady as an age old wine, only growing stronger in time
Warm and fresh as the napalm glow of sun, in a forest of pine
I wish the strength of my love build me stronger day by day
Instead you remind me of how easy I am to be destroyed by you every single day

I know of happiness as a moment that is fleeting
A precious something that slips while I'm left grasping at nothing
So I learn not to let anything take that meaning
For otherwise, I will be left alone and wanting

I wish nothing more than numbness to consume my body
My tears turn to icicles that crawls into every tiny cuts in my fragile heart
Freeze it solid so none may break it apart
As you did, my love, to my fragile heart